I was on the bus this morning, and rode past a high-end men's clothing store that had the following message printed (permanently) on its display window:
Clothes make the man
in the professional world
man is judged by his appearance
Now, the question I have isn't, 'is this statement true?' We are all very well aware that, unfortunately, it is. That saddens me. The question I have is, 'why is that acceptable?'
One of the meetings that had a big impact on me a couple months ago encouraged members to think about what rules about food and appearance from childhood could have contributed to our weight-gain. For example, I suffer from an anxiety about the availability of food. I grew up knowing that after mealtime, the kitchen would be closed. I think receiving that messages over and over when I was young has contributed to my feeling that, 'if I don't eat it now it won't be there later,' even in situations where it will obviously be there later (ie: my own kitchen!).
This statement that society will judge you dependent upon your appearance can only create anxiety for those who suffer ANY type of physical 'abnormality' (and I take exception to the words 'normal' and 'abnormal' in society's definitions as well). This includes not only those who are overweight (or underweight) and could be doing something about it, but also those who suffer from acne, have scars or birthmarks, have suffered amputation, have bland-colored hair- ANYthing. What messages are we receiving, and often, sending?! Sending messages such as, "man is judged by his appearance" just serve to create appearance anxiety for those receiving it- and I vow right now to do my best not to send that message to my children (b'sha'ah tova).
Why are we not focusing on the inner good in others, and more importantly, ourselves. Not that anyone actually reads this blog, but I call on anyone who reads this- reject the idea that appearance defines the person. Look deeper, focus on the inside, concentrate on what MATTERS!
stupid men's store slogan.
posted by Becky @ 9:00 AM
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